Mr TCs doctor told us that he will likely only need 8 rounds of chemo. Next week is his fourth bout, so he is almost halfway through it. The doctor also reckons that Mr TCs prognosis is "very good ... he possibly could go on to clear this."
"Forever?" I asked.
"Forever."
It's not a promise, but fuck it's relieving. I had SO MANY questions for the doctor, at one point I was just machine-gunning them to him, Mr TC turns to me with an "Are you fucking right!?" look. Heh heh. When Mr TC asked the doctor if he thought the tumours were shrivelling, because that's what it felt like, the doctor looked at Mr TC like he was a fuckwit, making Mr TC feel like a dickhead for asking. When we got up to leave, I noticed, with much satisfaction, that Monkeys bottle of formula had leaked all over the docs office floor. Suck a fart.
We walked past all of the other cancer people, many of them old, their eyes lighting up when they saw such a tiny baby. Mr TC was adamant he wanted to hold Monkey the whole time we were there, as if to say "Look! I might have been facing Death, but here, Here I have Life!!"
In the car on the way home, I counted up five more chemos, and saw that the date of the last chemo is the 24th October ...... my nine-year clean and sober birthday. It's a sign.
Later that night, I made a chocolate cake with sprinkles, and before I cut it I sang a full rendition of "Happy Almost Halfway Through Chemo to Yooouuuuuuu ........" Tiger sang it too, then thought for a moment. "Mum, what's chemo again?"
We all laughed and laughed, I ate three pieces in a row and felt so sick that not even a peppermint tea made it better. I didn't care.
"Forever?" I asked.
"Forever."
It's not a promise, but fuck it's relieving. I had SO MANY questions for the doctor, at one point I was just machine-gunning them to him, Mr TC turns to me with an "Are you fucking right!?" look. Heh heh. When Mr TC asked the doctor if he thought the tumours were shrivelling, because that's what it felt like, the doctor looked at Mr TC like he was a fuckwit, making Mr TC feel like a dickhead for asking. When we got up to leave, I noticed, with much satisfaction, that Monkeys bottle of formula had leaked all over the docs office floor. Suck a fart.
We walked past all of the other cancer people, many of them old, their eyes lighting up when they saw such a tiny baby. Mr TC was adamant he wanted to hold Monkey the whole time we were there, as if to say "Look! I might have been facing Death, but here, Here I have Life!!"
In the car on the way home, I counted up five more chemos, and saw that the date of the last chemo is the 24th October ...... my nine-year clean and sober birthday. It's a sign.
Later that night, I made a chocolate cake with sprinkles, and before I cut it I sang a full rendition of "Happy Almost Halfway Through Chemo to Yooouuuuuuu ........" Tiger sang it too, then thought for a moment. "Mum, what's chemo again?"
We all laughed and laughed, I ate three pieces in a row and felt so sick that not even a peppermint tea made it better. I didn't care.
13 comments:
your righting is so raw and honest. I love it.
I am SO FUCKING glad that the Dr seems to think that everything will be alright (and doctors would not say so if it werent true). I def believe in signs- and his last day of chemo and your anniversary- must mean something.
I am so proud of all of you.
your righting is so raw and honest. I love it.
I am SO FUCKING glad that the Dr seems to think that everything will be alright (and doctors would not say so if it werent true). I def believe in signs- and his last day of chemo and your anniversary- must mean something.
I am so proud of all of you.
Go the chocolate cake!!! You oinker you! I am so pleased that today at least you have some good news. Some reassurance. Damn that must feel good.
Mr TC - such a sad story about his Dad. But you know - good on you for finding him. Man, families. They really do screw us up sometimes.
This is good. Very good. I am with you eating the chocolate cake with sprinkles and singing to Mr TC who I have never met and will never meet but find myself caring about.
Hugs
A sign for sure.
Hang in there TC family. We are all pulling for you.
A sign. Some good news at the half way point...
Man, I'm keeping everything crossed for you guys,
xx
J
Your PI story is a wonderful one.
I am so, so, so happy to hear the DR's news. I am hoping he beats this bastard !
I love it when you say "suck a fart"...it sounds like something I'd say in real life ;).
I'm so happy to hear that the prognosis for Mr. TC is good. I can't wait to tell my Sunday school class! We've been praying for him!!
What a great thing to hear a doctor say, especially because they are always filled with such doom and gloom. If you have one offering you and the Mr. such positivity, I would run with it. He wouldn't say it unless there was a damn lot pointing in that direction! WhoooHooo! Relieving indeed!
You have investigation skills to add to that resume, huh? You are quite the woooo-maaan! You go girl
Isaac's dad is MIA, too, after kidnapping charges and wife battery during Isaac's childhood. When I first met Isaac, he even thought he was dead. Apparently he wasn't/isn't. From what I can see in the three pictures we have of his dad, they look very similar. It always makes me wonder when older men come up to my husband and talk to him like they know him already--could they think Isaac is his dad?
Anyway, I have always wanted to find Isaac's dad and just see him in person. Isaac wants nothing of it, so I won't do anything until he gives me the go ahead. But still...it is weird to me that someone so "close" to Isaac is so far away. (hmm...hope that makes sense)
Its a pity some doc's have such crap bedside manners but it sounds like a great visit anyway. Yah for halfway!
The cake was a really sweet idea, I bet Mr TC was stoked.
As I read the story about Mr. TC's dad, I had this thought that the two of you are like some great pair of archetypes. Your characters are so large, like The Great Mother & The Hero or something like that.
http://www.amazon.com/Goddesses-Everywoman-Powerful-Archetypes-Womens/dp/0060572841/ref=pd_bbs_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1217033006&sr=8-1
I am so happy for you all that the doctor was able to give you hope. Thank God for that ... as for the MD looking at Mr. TC like he was a fuckwit ... GAH. Like cancer isn't bad enough? Does he insult orpans and widows, too? That lack of empathy is like a disability. Like the doctor intelligence part of his brain grew so tall in the forest of his head that it blocked out the sun from all the little comapassion seedlings and just starved them to death. I know it's a hard job, but it can't be harder than having cancer. Dolt.
You've got to listen to this (heard it this afternoon and thought of you):
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=92921946
"Researchers report that they've been able to use tobacco plants as biological factories to manufacture specialized proteins needed for an experimental individualized cancer therapy. They are studying one type of cancer, a potentially fatal form of non-Hodgkin's lymphoma."
Hugs for you and all of yours, my vengeful friend.
D. was here.
xxoo
I forgot you went pw protectd - It doesn't light up on my reader to show me new posts - So sorry I'm late- BUT YAH for some good news! I am glad that you guys are just making it through one day at a time
I'm always looking for signs in dates and numbers - the October 24th date makes me very happy.
I love how ballsy you are. Calling up this stranger and filling him in on his life.
"Suck a fart." I'm going to find a way to use that today.
Kristin/Tob. Brun.
I am SO GLAD for all of you that you got to hear some good news, even if it was delivered in a jerkface manner. Suck a fart indeed! He's going to beat this.
So sad for Mr. TC that he didn't know his dad for so long. You are right, everyone deserves a chance to know where they are from.
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