Thursday, 24 January 2008

Three Photos, Two Stretchmarks, and a Broken Pube

I used to marvel at the pregnant bloggers progress .... it seemed that one minute they saw the heartbeat and were still flushed with the giddiness of the BFP, and then, gradually, the news would entail talk of prams and baby showers and swollen bellies. I can feel myself hovering - no longer am I scared stiff at the thought of an early miscarriage, yet I still put off buying babystuff until at least viability. (Today I'm at 23 weeks). New thoughts have crept through my head .... as well as some doubts, like how will I manage to care for a newborn, manage the housework, yet still work from home, etc. Today I saw a tiny baby at the park, and just couldn't believe that I will hold one in May. In four months! I'm getting closer to believing it's going to happen ...

Lately, Mr TC has been freaked out. He thinks he's too old, and says that the thought of pushing a pram down the street makes him feel sick. I told him look at Brad Pitt - he's over 40 with four young kids hanging off his arm, but he only looks hotter. Mr TC didn't buy it. No loving partner just as desperate for a baby as me - last week he actually cringed when he looked at my belly. That was it. "Look, do you think I'm not scared sometimes too? But you went in this with your eyes wide open hon, so please don't shudder when you look at me! This is our reality! So deal!!" I wonder what it would feel like for your husband to put his hand on your tummy in wonder? I'm not mad - a little worried about how much this will affect our marriage. I'm still reeling from our New Zealand ordeal - I mean holiday. The thought of bringing another child into all the ... dynamics, just scared the absolute crap outta me. The stepkids flew back to their mum on Monday, the immense relief I felt at having my house back was enormous. Tom wants to move back in with us ... in 6 months. He said his dad is his best friend and he misses him. I have visions of me moving out with Tiger and a newborn, being a single mother. I've made the very healthy decision of living in the day, and not getting ahead of myself. If Tom does come back, it would be at the end of this year .... and by GOD would I have some ground rules.

I nearly rang up the nurse to look at my amnio results and tell me what sex Monkey is, but I stayed strong. So it really, truly is going to be a big surprise. I showed my sisters the ultrasound pics, I pointed out the penis to the them; they swear it's a vagina. So, we just don't know. I truly don't mind - sometimes I sway, and would prefer one over the other, but it always changes. Healthy will do me just fine.

Annoying bitch that I am - never in my life have I got a stretch mark. No weight issues for me; actually, I'm not even smug, because all of my issues are mental HA. I'd swap some of my high metabolism for some peace of mind any day - truly. Anyway, it seems as if I now do indeed have stretch marks - two, in fact, on my lower stomach. What the!?! Furious oil rubbing has since followed the discovery, i shall wait and see.

Finally, I have a broken pube. In Australia, we call pubic hairs 'pubes'. Yes, it appeared that the only interesting thing I had to report at yesterdays midwife appointment was an ingrown pube on my pubis bone. It doesn't hurt, but it's quite swollen. She didn't seem perturbed - do I just let it be for the rest of my life?

Finally, here are some pics. The first two are just me and Mr TC ... in NZ. (It wasn't all bad. Was it???)

Mr TC has discovered a new way of getting in the photo himself - he does this all the time now - this was in a park in Christchurch ...

Holding hands at the Cadbury Factory in Dunedin ....

And lucky last - here's a pic of my two favourite sisters dressed as Kath and Kim at Mr TC's surprise 40th fancy dress party in '06. Rex is Kath, on the left, and Tee is Kim on the right. I love them like, well, - sisters!! Who knew we would end up such great mates!! Thank you so much for your love, support, and especially your honesty, girls. Yooz rock. xoxoxoxxoxo


Chas said...

I don't know about Brad Pitt being HOTTER since the kids came along...but he's still hot, always will be.

BTW, who are Kath and Kim? Never heard of em.

Fertilize Me said...

Glad for an update - UGH to the stepmonsters coming to live with you ?! broken pube ..haha so sorry just sounds funny

A said...

I'm glad to hear from you. I wish that you were in better places, though. It seems that quite the majority of the pregnant ladies are still on the fence as far as talking about baby related items.

Can I just say that you look wonderful pregnant?!! I even showed your pic to my favorite co-worker showing her how I want to look when I get preggo! You are beautiful!!!

(I'm hoping that when Mr. TC holds Monkey, he'll realize the fear is minimal compared to the love.)

A said...

(and actually i hope that happens earlier than that)

Mony said...

Love that photo of you 2 on the grass!
Missed your updates.
Look at meeee kimmie.

SaraS-P said...

Ouch on the broken pube!

And I can't imagine a life without stretch marks! I had them at age 10!

anna said...

How dare Mr. TC cringe at beautiful you?! You are truly an amazingly gorgeous pregnant woman so don't let him get you down! I agree that the one-day-at-a-time approach is definitely the best way to go. Worrying now about what will happen at the end of the year is silly. Just enjoy each day now- strut your hot pregnant self around (broken pube or not!), and it'll be o.k.!

Stacie said...

I am so glad you posted. Ok. I just have to say that I was more than a little curious about the pictures when I read the title of the post. Wasn't sure if we'd get a picture of each stretch mark and the pube, too. Made me a little scared to scroll down! :-) And as for mr. tc, the men in our lives get nervous, too. They realize that a new baby will change things, and let's face it, they are creatures of habit. New baby = upset habits. The cringing thing should have earned him a smack, though. (because you look beautiful and that was hurtful)

Yeah for living in the day and not getting ahead of yourself!

assvice warning: It concerns me that ss says his dad is his best friend. (teenagers shouldn't really consider parents best friends in my opinion. that may come later, when the kid is an adult. when one of my 8th graders says something like that, I always know that the kid gets away with murder at home.) I think ss thinks he'll get his way when he moves in with mr. tc. Definitely place a lot of ground rules (and what the consequences will be when they are broken because they will be--what would you expect to happen in certain situations and what would he expect to happen in the same situations) before ss comes anywhere near you guys again.

you are sounding better, tc. I am so glad!

Evil Stepmonster said...

So glad to hear from you TC. So sorry to hear about the stretchmarks ..... nah, not really!

I am in week 1 of my 15 year old tom living with us and I am already wondering how I will cope. His dad is his best mate also and yes he gets away with absolute murder. My assvice? I know we mere stepmothers have little say in these arrangements, but put it off as long as possible in the hope that girls become more interesting than dad!

Gemini Girl said...

look at how fit you are sister!

I cannot believe you are 23 weeks pg-wow time has flown!!! You have strong willpower not to find out the sex- I am not capable of that kind of surprise.

Angie said...

Wow! You look great! I can't believe you're 23 weeks already, congrats!

Lori said...

Mmmmmm. Cadbury.

You have some fantastic cheekbones.

And I really love the photo of you on the grass. Fabulous composition.

Try a hot flannel (is that what you Aussies say?) on the ingrown. Youch. Glad it doesn't hurt.

Geohde said...

Your post made me giggle, well the broken bit did anyway. Maybe it lost it's sens of direction with the belly above it?