Tuesday, 29 May 2007

Ready, Set, GO

I hardly watch tv now I have discovered blogs. Who knew? I see the RE again next week. To sign consent forms, get BCP prescription, look at a bowel gas ultrasound .... I hope I can start SOON!!! AF is due on the 16th June. Bring it on!

I feel anxious, excited, and impatient about starting ivf. It's so DELIBERATE, isn't it. No "oops" involved. I'm in awe of the procedures available. Worried about the shots, and how cranky I may get. I have vowed to myself to keep my "cranky symptoms" to myself, as Mr TC is concerned at how shitty I might be.

Slowly but steadily over the past three years, my pregnancy/baby radar has grown stronger. Bellies, babies, everywhere. The yearning, aching, deep, deepest desire. I don't believe I've wanted anything more. And I just realised yesterday that I don't want everyone to know because it's just PRIVATE. I don't feel ashamed, but if I go through all of this with no baby at the end, well .... I just don't want people to know. I told one of my sisters yesterday - the first person I have opened up to about it. Her youngest just turned 2 - she was so sweet, saying I could have her cot, pram, clothes, etc. omygodthatwouldbesocoolpleasepleaseplease


Mony said...

One of the few times you actually WANT AF to begin!
IVF here you come! Hope we can help you through the process...

Gemini Girl said...

I agree with Mony- I remember when I got my period before IVF, it was truly the first time in my entire life that I was happy to see it.

As for the shots/crankiness, it'll be ok. I did get cranky and bloated. My husband was not too happy about the bitchiness but he knew it was for a good cause!