Thursday, 18 September 2008


As always, the cold light of day brings a better perspective on things.

This morning, Mr TC brought Monkey into my bed. I kissed Mr TC goodbye, and then Tiger came in. We spent half an hour giggling and laughing, Tiger doing Ace Ventura impressions to make Monkey smile. We all got up and I gave Monkey a bottle while Tiger did his homework ... if he finishes it, I will take hime to see Wall-E tonight. A special treat on a schoolnight.

I went back and forth to my boys, kissing them and drinking them in, thinking to myself how perfect they are and how lucky I am.

Tiger told me all about the poo that Monkey did the other day .. "You shouldda seen it mum! It was PERFECTLY ROUND LIKE A MEATBALL!! A total circle!!" Then he played Mario, and as always, said Mario 'Bros', rhyming it with toss.

"What does Bros mean again mum?"


"Ohhhhh, that's right. Pauses. That's actually silly."

I packed his lunch, we laughed that he got the last two chocolate biscuits, leaving none for Mr TC.

My heartlight is back on again. As Mr TC and I always say to each other in a stupid voice ... "CRISIS AVERTED."



OHN said...

topcat...not knowing the actual do's and dont's of AA or NA but are you allowed to talk to your doc about antidepressants? Dear it really sounds like you could be a poster child for them. I have been in the dark hole you fall into off and on lately and they have helped me ENORMOUSLY and helped me see the light of day a little more clearly.

Topcat said...

Ahhhhh, antidepressants. Yes lovely ohn ... I have thought of them, especially lately. I guess I'm waiting to see if Mr TC goes into remission, before I get to that. I'm ringing his doctor today, to see when his scan is. xo

bleu said...

YAY for you. I really think sharing here too does help hun, putting it out there, like at meetings, and sharing it helps.

Much much love

Tee said...

Oh mate what a c*nt of a day you had yesterday! And the day before, well the whole month really, and the one before that, you get the message...

I admire you brozone. And I love you more than I could ever write. I would swap 'fiascos' with you in a second if I could.

I'm glad we had our chat this morn before I read yesterday's post cause speaking to you today, I know, KNOW you will be alright. You may be the fuck-knuckle, but knuckles are the linchpin, they tie everything together. Yuk, I just got a vision of knuckle-less fingers FOUL!

You know what to do to make sure you are ok through all of this - I don't need to throw my 10 cents in here.

Love you dear Topcat
Tee (aka The Minholic)

Vee said...

TC some days can be so freakin tough and I am so glad today is a bit better than yesterday for you. Thanks Tee for reassuring us.

Reading your last post makes me not feel so alone. I thank you for that but I do wish you didn't have to be dealing with all this shit! The tears the ups and downs, it's just not fair !

Why does the universe keepdealing this shit, why not spread it around ?

Hugs to you.

Gemini Girl said...

I am glad you had a good day. You deserve one so badly.

I feel guilty complaining about my life, when others are having a harder time.

You are one strong mama- even though you think it's just a facade. You wouldnt be sober all these years if it were.

Wordgirl said...

No words TC, just hugs.

A giant hug -- and then perhaps some cross-legged sitting on hardwood floors in the sun drinking soy lattes and bitching about how fucked up life is.


and more xo's


MrsSpock said...

Whatever would we do without the Internet? Purging via computer feels so good sometimes...

Vacant Uterus said...

So glad today is looking up! The "round like a meatball" poo had me cracking up. And did he do that? That boy has talent!

I echo Mrs. Spock, thank God for the internets. Whatever would we do without each other? *hugs*


(Did you get my Twitter about a brain cell name? Thought maybe Bogart would do but I'm still brainstorming in case not.)