Wednesday, 22 August 2007

On the Sixth Day ... Let There Be Reeds

This morning I told Mr Topcat that my follicles feel like reeds in a pond. He almost gagged. But I'm excited - finally, after six days of stimming, the nuns piss might actually be doing something. I'm bloated, and can feel .... things goin on. Wish I had special Babymaking Goggles that I could put on and see what's happening inside my belly. How cool! You'd be able to watch, after embryo transfer, to see if this shit works or not. Fuck the HPT's. It'd be like CNNNN, with updates every hour, on the hour. "And breaking news .... we have implantation!" And watch it all happen.

Oops, did I just think all that out loud?

All will be revealed tomorrow morning, with the Deep Space Anal Probe #1. I mean the Wandmonkey. He's not getting out of it this time! He's goin DOWN. (Ha - he really is ..)

Mr TC think "Bill is a great name hon." I said ummm, well, that's my dads name, remember? (Drunken violent Scottish dad who our mother left when I was four, he died of said alcoholism when I was 12).

Mr TC: "Oh, that doesn't matter hon. Bill's a cool name".

Me: "Yeah .... but that was my DADS name." (Thinking, bad idea to even talk of names before the actual egg retrieval, no?)

Mr TC: "But you never even knew your dad".


Actually I have 2 dead dads. Our stepdad of eleven years topped himself when I was 16. I have been to so many funerals - both close friends and family. At last count it was 23 funerals I have attended. SO much death, I guess it's why I obsess over the "what's it all about" scenario, try not to waste a single day anymore. I realised today that it is 24 years ago exactly that our "real" (ha) dad died. I rang my sister, laughing. She told me she was in a lift.

Me: "Happy Anniversary!"

Tezz: "What for?"

Me: "It's 24 years since Bill died!" Pissing myself laughing. (I know that's weird, but after so much bullshit and crap and therapy, my sisters and I are finally reconciling our ridiculously dreadful family life. Plus, we just think that shit's funny)

Tezz: "How the fuck do you even KNOW that!!" We just laughed together, her in a lift in Double Bay, me driving through Katoomba's fog.

Me: "Tezz, we really do put the FUN in dysFUNctional".

I will have a detailed account of "What the Dildocam Saw" tomorrow. Hope everyone's cool. xoxoxox


Reproductive Jeans said...

Yea...hmm, what could we call this version of CNNNN? ITAB (is there a baby) news? Eh, Im low on creativity tonight--but I wish there was something too!
Hope all goes well tomorrow!

Fertilize Me said...

Oh we TOTALLY need "see if my embryo is sticking" goggles!! Hurry up and much us some ;) and glad to see that all life has thrown at you, you kept your sense of humor!

Evil Stepmonster said...

Someone said [i think it was Tertia] that when an embyro implants our big toenail should turn blue.

That bloated feeling is weird huh? After years of ignorance you are suddenly hyper-aware of exactly where your ovaries are.

Wishing you all the best for your meeting with the wandmonkey tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

LOL still laughing about the warped sense of 'yuma' you and your sisters have!

Megan said...

definitely count me in for a pair of those goggles! ;)

thanks for popping in over at my blog! :)

SaraS-P said...

If you invent babymaking goggles, you'll make a fortune!

r.a.w. said...

If you make the goggles, I will buy them. Hope the wandmonkey wasn't too annoying.

And I think there are 8 zillion names other than Bill that you could use. I'll buy Mr. TC a babyname book.

anna said...

Good luck tomorrow! Maybe your hubby and mine should hang out- mine thinks Rocket is a good first name for a boy!

Amy R said...

I hope the dildocam showed you some good news!