I have been taking Synarel every 12 hours like clockwork - I think one morning I was 10 minutes late, but otherwise I've been really vigilant. Today I've had ovulation pain. I really, really hope I'm wrong. But I know my body pretty well ... all shall be revealed on Friday I guess.
Drove down to Sydney today to get my car serviced. The problem with having a fancy schmancy car is having to go to a fancy schmancy mechanic. I really didn't feel like going - weepy, anxious, ugly, yucky etc etc. I felt lost - even the shops couldn't cheer me up. I was self-conscious and weird, and everyone was better than me. I've decided that I'm only doing IVF once, as it's impacted me so much - physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. (Yep - that about covers it!). I don't think I could go through it again. It's not fair on any of us. Thank God it's relatively quick once you get started, really.
5 comments:
If memory serves me correctly, I experienced something similiar with the O pain. I hadn't O'd just got the feeling.
Getting nervous for you. But good nervous.
Remember the power of positive thought.......
As for cars and mechanics. Don't even start me.
Awww thanks! Hope Mr. Wand Monkey is kind to you and you get the go ahead to start injecting :D
Of course IVF is emotionally taxing- but I was well prepared to go through it again if it didnt work the first time. I think the gift of a child is well worth all the mental/physical anguish and I will probably do it again in the future. As I layed on the hospital bed shortly after the retrieval , I just knew that I was doing it for my kids.
A couple things...firstly that picture in the header is really hauntingly sad to me for some reason. I think it is touching a part of my heart that I buried a loooong time ago.
Secondly, since I am rushing to get caught up with your blog, what did the doc say about your "twisted off to one side, pointed down" cervix that you posted about in April? Will that play into your upcoming fun times?
Thirdly, good for you that you have come through the other side so to speak. Many years ago (I was 14) I lost a friend to heroin, not literally, she didn't die but in a way she did. We left school in the spring and when we came back in the fall she was a mess. It was heartbreaking. I told her that I couldn't be friends with her any more. Later,she told me I had saved her life. SHe said she couldn't quit thinking about what I had told her and eventually with the help of her family and counseling and doctors, she was able to sort of return to her old self but looking into her eyes there was a darkness that never went away. She had done unspeakable things (age 14, 15) to pay for her fixes and was no longer a child.
Sorry, didn't mean to monopolize your post, it just brought back a memory.
I read that story in the paper too! Yeah, well the Tele obviously hasn't heard of infertility blogs....!
Breathe honey. You are doing fine. IVF is quite the mindfuck in everyway.
When my ovaries got sore, I wore my husband's kidney belt under my clothes (stretchy elastic belt with velcro ends) it helped a great deal. Hopefully you won't need anything like that. And I hope that you get pregnant on your first IVF. Because, you know, it can happen apparently!!!! Love Ya!
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