Plucking my chinhairs in the rear view mirror of my car this morning, I got to thinking. I'd had a particularly brief dream last night, involving Gwyneth Paltrow, who was about to fall pregnant. I woke up, with lingering feelings of jealousy. That she could just decide, and get pregnant, just like that.
I also realised ..... I see a pregnant belly in the street - and I feel jealous!! WTF, man. I'm 34 weeks myself, how crazy is that. I think it's been so inbuilt in me now for quite a few years, maybe it's entrenched and I'll always get a pang when I notice a pregnant woman?
Some women are definitely more 'showy' about it than others .... belly rubbing, an aura around them that they want you to look and notice their gestationary situation. (Actually, I fear I was a bit like that with Tiger. "Look at moi look at moi!!") ...
Sometimes I think I better hurry up and enjoy being pregnant ..... revel in it, don't let all the moments escape. But I find myself hiding my bump a lot. I HATE people staring at me, except when it's on my terms. I especially hate middle aged men looking at me like I'm some sort of freak. "Fuck off!!" I want to shout. "This is what you're mum looked like with YOOUUUU."
Ummmm, perhaps I'm a bit hormonal??
Anyway, I thought all this and didn't realise that the traffic light had turned green, and the people behind me weren't even beeping. They were too busy LAUGHING at the FREAK plucking her chin hairs in traffic.
Will I ever get some class?