36 Years Old and my Bedroom is a Disgrace to Humanity

Yes, this really is my bedroom. I am sooooooo together right now.

Once upon a time I wanted to get pregnant through IVF so I had this bright idea to google it, to see how the fuck it was done. Up came boring, medical, technical, shit ..... and, a blog. "A blog!" I thought. "Hmmmmm, how interesting." I clicked on, and started reading. It was M. Beautiful, wonderful M, whose story broke my heart. But I read and read and read ... for hours. Then I started clicking on other blogs, in her blogroll (which is why I think blogrolls are important) .... and then I'm like what! Omg! Sheee-iiiitttt!!!!!!! I read more and more of your stories, and like the true addict I will always be, I couldn't get enough. Television fell by the wayside. I would go to sleep at 2am.

Then, I really WAS going to do IVF, so I (so nervously) started one of my own. Then I started commenting .... and people started commenting on mine!!! Blogging is fucking outstanding ... specifically, women bloggers who are trying to build families. Or parent their children. Live good lives. In the early days of pioneering in Australia, it was very lonely for the womenfolk. It's such a harsh climate, they were very isolated, and missed their families back in England. So they would write to each other, write and write and write. Books have been published, of these womens letters, and the friendships and bonds they formed.


So, even though blogging is new, it is age-old .... this connecting.



Anyway, please bear with me, as I am belatedly entering M's Virtual World Tour. She asked if we could snap random pics of things around our house. Anything M asks, I will do. For she was my entryway into blogging, she is still trying to have a child, and I simply will not rest until she has one in her arms. Spirit owes me a few IOUs this year, and I've paid them forward onto her .... and others like her. Because infertility and loss is so not motherfucking fair, so not fair.



Tiger took this this morning, as we were about to leave on our walk. I walked him to school, which takes just under an hour each way. (It's only the second time I've ever done it. But Christ I feel better when I do!) ......





This is the view looking down our street .......









Mr TC made this rock stand upright, during landscaping. I was looking at it the other day, and said to him ... "You DO know that's your penis, right?" He had no idea what I was talking about, I thought about explaining phallic symbols, but couldn't be bothered ....









This is the bed I cried in last night, curled up. Thinking for SURE I would be off house hunting today.


This is the chair I was sitting in when Mr TC told me he had cancer. Worst conversation of my life .....





This is what happens when you make a carrot cake for your husband and stepson, and they leave it out all night so it goes rock hard, but then they throw a tea-towel on it so the icing sticks to the tea towel, and guess who is the prick that has to clean it up? ME ......


Here is my disgusting pantry. My heart feels heavy even looking at it. It's so unorganized ....

Here is a nice wedding pic. With the wedding cake topper - that's Tiger as a red-cheeked baby next to it ...

Lastly, my favourite painting. I bought it before I met Mr TC ... it's called "The Happy People." It's of a group of Hare Krishnas, dancing. The artists son died of a heroin overdose, she is aamzing ....

So. Click HERE for more participants.

___

Ok, so I just changed Monkeys nappy but I forgot to do it up properly after I changed it, so when I stood up, shit got flung everywhere. And I didn't just stand up, I sort of swung around so shit literally went flying across the room, but at least now I am laughing.

Eight years on, and there's still a whole lotta shit in my life. Heh.

XOXOXOXOX